I think I'm not truly a kind of someone could be categorized as a true friend, for some of my friends. Even they are my closest ones. I don't know why this feeling is being bigger as the time flies. To make me as the righteous, I'll let my self to think that my friends started it from the first place. They show those attitudes so it's not my mistake to give the same as reward.
To make it simpler, one of them consider me as her rival. She blatantly shows this rivalry atmosphere between us last year. It's about a test to get a job. We applied to different companies! But it had the same regulations. Even information which can help your friend, which won't give you any bad effect, could be really hard to be done. Just because you think it's a competition. Who got job the first was the best, was the winner.
And this year it's happened again. Sadly I'm the one who had been announced for being failed. And she didn't. I mean not yet. *look how evil my mind is*. Just thinking she will pass the test (though her success in the test never give a single piece of reason in my failure) made my heart like boiling water in a sealed pan. Just like what my bro ever said jokingly, "which one is sadder? Look at your friend in trouble or she is luckier than you?" Lol..
Am I that bad?
No lah! I still have some friends I care of with the whole heart of mine. I congratulate them sincerely from the deepest of my heart. I support them in every decision they make and advise them with utterances which I produced by being a big wise thinker. Even if I know their success will be greater than I can achieve. Because they are not only friends for me but the Best ones of mine.
nah your not.. its happen to everyone of us as a human..
ReplyDeletesometime, even me myself feel jealous with someone great performance.. their success in everything..
and sometime, I feel glad that I'm not the only one who fall and there was someone below than me.. (this happen only for exam, in job, daily life, doesn't happen.. I'm not jealous of that thing) I know.. its my bad keep thinking something like that.. (somehow in deep of my heart, I keep apologized for what I've said unintentionally)
that's the reason why I keep telling myself.. I should stop think negative.. he got what he deserved.. maybe its not my time yet.. yups.. that's it.. I'll try more and more until I success.. remember this word "fail once doesn't mean failure forever and doesn't mean you failed for everything else" :)
“Pain is temporary. Quitting lasts forever.”
― Lance Armstrong, Every Second Counts
keep your hard work Lia :D you can do it ^___^
Dear, I can't drop any comment on your blog. I can't find your.cbox either T.T help me. Please...
DeleteOh dear.. What a wisdom you've told me. It means a lot to me. Yes, not to make myself as the righteous, I am kinda 'collective' in having that kind of feeling. I mean, you give me apple then you get one from me. Lol. Yes.. Think positively is the only way we can move on to the better future.
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